Sending Family Photo Christmas Cards: A Gay Dad’s Survival Guide

With the season comes one of the most charming yet stressful traditions: the family photo Christmas card. On the surface, it’s simple. Gather the family, snap a cute picture, and mail it out to loved ones. In reality? It’s a high-stakes production involving bribery, tears (yours and theirs), and the kind of chaos that leaves you questioning why you ever thought this was a good idea.

As a gay dad with a toddler, sending out our annual Christmas card is a labor of love—emphasis on labor. But hey, what better way to show the world your family’s love (and resilience) than by showcasing a photo where at least one person isn’t crying? Let’s dive into the process—and why the Pride & Parenting GAYD apron is officially part of my holiday arsenal.

The Pressure to Get It Right

There’s something about Christmas cards that makes them feel like a test of your parenting skills. It’s like the unspoken holiday competition of who can look the most polished while secretly being one candy cane away from a meltdown. This year, my husband and I decided it was our turn to ace it. We were going to have a photo so good, people would frame it.

Spoiler: That did not happen.

The first challenge? Outfits. We’re two dads raising a toddler who thinks pants are optional, so coordinating holiday attire felt like mission impossible. We settled on matching sweaters for the adults and a festive dress for our daughter—a compromise that seemed brilliant until she insisted on wearing her rain boots. Bright yellow ones. In every photo.

The Photo Shoot (AKA The Hunger Games)

Picture this: It’s a crisp December morning, and we’ve scouted the perfect outdoor location. The lighting is gorgeous, the scenery festive, and our toddler is… not having it. Within five minutes, she’s running in the opposite direction, pulling her hair bow off, and shouting, “I want snacks!”

Enter the Pride & Parenting GAYD apron. While I’m no stranger to the multitasking required of parenting, this apron brought me to a new level. The phrase “Go Ask Your Dad” boldly printed on the front made me laugh every time I saw it. More importantly, it became my mantra for the day. At one point, when our daughter demanded yet another snack, I pointed to my husband and said, “Go ask your dad.” It was a small win in a chaotic moment, but I’ll take it.

The Perils of Choosing the Perfect Photo

After chasing our toddler, bribing her with snacks, and deploying every trick in the parenting playbook, we had approximately 87 photos to choose from. And let me tell you, finding the perfect Christmas card shot was no easy feat.

• The Laughably Bad: These included the ones where someone’s eyes were closed, our daughter was mid-sneeze, or I was awkwardly adjusting my GAYD apron.

• The Almost Good: These were the ones where everything looked perfect except for one glaring detail—like our daughter holding a half-eaten candy cane she’d stolen from my pocket.

• The Winner: In the end, we went with a candid shot. It wasn’t perfect, but it was us: my husband laughing, me holding our squirming toddler, and a lot of genuine joy. Yellow rain boots included.

The Reality of Writing the Card

Once the photo was chosen, it was time to write the card. This part always feels like trying to sum up an entire year in a few sentences. Do we talk about the highs (finally getting our daughter to eat vegetables) and gloss over the lows (a certain incident involving glitter glue and the dog)? Or do we keep it light and breezy?

We opted for humor—a quick update about our lives and a nod to the chaos of parenting. The GAYD apron even made it into the card as a joke, with the caption: “Parenting pro tip: When in doubt, just say, ‘Go ask your dad.’”

The Logistics of Sending Them Out

Now comes the part no one talks about: addressing and mailing the cards. If you’ve ever sat down to handwrite addresses while your toddler tries to “help” by drawing on the envelopes, you know the struggle.

This year, we went digital with pre-printed labels. Game-changer. Of course, our daughter insisted on adding stickers to every envelope, so now our cards feature festive reindeer… and dinosaurs.

Why We Keep Doing It

Despite the stress, the bribes, and the questionable footwear choices, sending Christmas cards is one of my favorite traditions. There’s something powerful about sharing a little piece of our family with the world. As gay parents, it’s also a chance to celebrate visibility—to show that love makes a family, no matter what that family looks like.

The responses we get each year remind us why it’s worth the effort. Friends comment on how much our daughter has grown. Family members tell us how much they love seeing our smiles. And for a moment, the chaos fades away, replaced by gratitude for the life we’ve built.

Tips for Your Own Christmas Card Adventure

If you’re ready to tackle your own family photo Christmas cards, here are a few tips to make it (slightly) less stressful:

1. Plan Ahead: Choose outfits and a photo location early. If you’re ordering cards online, give yourself plenty of time for shipping.

2. Embrace Imperfection: The best photos are often the candid ones. Don’t stress about perfection—just capture the love.

3. Delegate: Let someone else handle part of the process, whether it’s taking the photo or addressing envelopes. Bonus points if you have a GAYD apron to remind everyone who’s in charge.

4. Involve the Kids: Give them a small role, like placing stickers on envelopes or picking a favorite photo. It’ll keep them engaged (and entertained).

5. Laugh Through It: When things go sideways—and they will—just roll with it. Years from now, you’ll look back and laugh.

A Final Word of Encouragement

To all the parents out there—gay, straight, or somewhere in between—you’re doing an amazing job. The holidays are stressful, but they’re also a time to celebrate the beautiful chaos of family life. Whether your Christmas card ends up on the fridge or tucked into a drawer, it’s a testament to the love that holds your family together.

So throw on your GAYD apron, snap those photos, and remember: when all else fails, just say, “Go ask your dad.”

Wishing you a joyful and slightly less chaotic holiday season from our family to yours.